Being jealous and having feelings of envy are normal to human nature. A little bit of jealousy combined with possessiveness is healthy, but if the same goes beyond control so much so that one of the partner feels suffocated in the relationship or one of the partner is constantly checking on the other, it can lead to a lot of social embarrassment.
How do you detect that you are jealous or over possessive? If you find yourself constantly wondering what the person is doing and not because you miss the other person but because you are jealous and feel that the partner may be with another man or woman, this kind of thought process will lead to suspicion, jealousy and can prove to be detrimental to a healthy relationship especially if you call up your partner several times in a day just to check where the other person is?
This kind of jealousy in the relationship will lead to fights and arguments till a point comes in the relationship when one of the partners walks out. This may even lead to a break-up or a divorce.
If you are exhibiting any of the above mentioned signs its time for you to examine your behavior and determine the cause of your behavior. Ask yourself a few relevant questions like why do you have these feelings of jealousy? Why do you want to constantly check on your partner? Try to find out the root cause of your behavior, is it because you genuinely believe that your partner is overly flirtatious or you have strong feelings of inadequacy.
Often jealousy stems from strong feelings of inadequacy or a low self-esteem. We may either berate ourselves constantly or always criticize a member of the opposite sex.
Please remember jealousy does not enhance your attraction in any way, in fact you appear to be a person who always harbors ill will towards others.
The next though that crops up in everybody’s mind is how to curb jealous thoughts in oneself or one’s partner? Don’t worry there are many solutions to curb jealousy and build a healthy relationship.
The first step in dealing with any kind of jealousy is to recognize that you or your partner is facing a problem of extreme jealousy. Firstly realize the fact that if your partner is a flirt or has actually been unfaithful, checking constantly on him or her is not really going to change them however if they have not done anything then it surely will annoy them and may make them feel suffocated.
So the thumb rule is unless you have caught them doing something do not suspect. Believe them if they offer an explanation for their behavior. Also get rid of any feelings of inadequacy in jealousy, because if the partner is with you then it definitely is out of choice and not any kind of compulsion.
If you are the one of those who has an overly jealous or possessive partner then I suggest that you find out what is the cause of this jealousy and possessiveness. Is it originating from your behavior or the cause is something else. Find out if you have either neglected your partner or unfairly compared them with someone else. If it is either of these then make changes to your behavior and if you feel that your partner has some psychological problems then suggest that they see a counselor and instead of stating that your partner see a counselor which may offend them suggest that both should see a counselor to understand what the problem is.
Handling the issue of jealousy in a relationship with sensitivity and understanding can cause the feelings of jealousy to die a slow death and mutual trust and understanding in the relationship will grow leading to a happy and fulfilling relationship.
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